A fellow blogger who runs the blog, “Kloipy Speaks” whom I follow and who incidentally follows me recently asked fellow bloggers and passerby to his sight to name two things which make them happy while at the same time makes them sad. He called it The Kloipy Projects: So Happy I’m Sad. Go check him out and see what he’s about if you would like. (but not before you finish this damn blogpost…me first)
He got me to thinking –
Hmmm, I wondered….what the hell possibly makes me sad and happy. Is it eating a bowl of ice cream and then suddenly that bowl of ice cream is empty? No, that does not make me happy and sad. Just happy and wanting more. So happy and pathetic was not the question.
So I thunk and thunk and thunk (picture Pooh bear tapping paw to head)
Via the ice-cream skewed analogy above. I discovered that most things which make a person sad and happy are things that were good in the past but came to an end or morphed into something other than the original happenstance or experience. So really for me, it results in nostalgia for something. So here are my two happy/sad moments which I always continue to have…I will also preface that the happy outweighs the sad by a factor of ten for me.
When I first walk into a comic book shop and get a whiff of the old musty smell which inhabits the nooks and cranies surrounding every corner. It fills my senses and induces a slight euphoria in my being and makes me at one with the world for a moment. Yeah, heavy stuff I know. But that’s what I feel. It feels so good to be in a comic book store…the synapses in my brain fire and bring about all my childhood memories growing up, delving and diving into a fantastic world of make believe and mayhem. It takes me back…then I’m sad just a little because I’m not that same person…I’ve grown up. I have a family, responsibilities, obligations…I can’t be carefree anymore…I have to engage in this thing called life.
My wife over the years – and I have known her many years – has made mixed tapes and mix CDs for me as I did for her. Its one of those romantic gestures you make when your in love. Its a tribute to your relationship and your acknowledgment of how much they mean to you. Every once in a while, I will pop one in and listen to it…
I am of course happy because the world seemed a simpler place. A fresh world of new possibilities and burgeoning experiences to be shared with a new love. Fresh raw primal passions (sexual) to envelope yourself in. Then I am sad a little, because some endearments can get lost or morphed from what they once were…not in a bad way just different….and some things you realize can never be the same but you find in that difference a new richness grows. There in its place is something more special that can only happen with time tested events and the chaos that life brings.
So there you have it…I hope you enjoyed my little trip into my brain….make sure to scrape your shoes on the mat before you leave. I don’t think you would want to be walking around with my thoughts on the bottom of your shoes mucking about in your world.
Feel free to share your own thoughts on what makes your sad and happy at the same time. I would love to hear them. Cheers.