Category Archives: Inquiring Minds

My introduction page as a writer trying to get publsihed and a collection of posts showing who I am through ancetdotal musings about my life or how I am inspired to write or why I write and how I write in my own wierd little way.

Some think they know her


She is a beauty.

Full of humor, wit and sarcasm with

a laughing smile that compels you to

smile in return.

When she invites you in she holds you close to her heart.

Her passion enthralls you, her empathy calls to you.

But do you know her like I do?

Do you see her open wounds

laid plainly on the table for all to see,

for ever has she been an open book

Stories of many a woe wound through her

various lives and lands she has traveled.

Read her story. See her.

Think her veneer made of steel, impervious

to your blows, constant and unrelenting?

She is fragile as any other soul in this world.

What battle is so important to be won that you

would scourge the field of her feelings til nary a blade

of grass stands underfoot.

Be warned, she is but a calm tempest

held at bay on the horizon that you invite in

with your callous words you sling so blindly.

I fear you would not survive her storm.

by Philip Wardlow January 16th, 2023

Noir Detective Story opening…Gun at the Head


DetectiveThere is a gun pointed at me by a woman in shadow right this very moment. Meager light from the street lamps fights it way through the blinds of my dark office as I sit behind my desk shrouded in nothingness.

Caught unaware I was, found with my left cheek upon my desk, asleep in a pool of my own drool alongside a bottle of rum sitting on its side with nary a drop to its name.

From my one eye that is allowed to see, light catches the barrel of the pistol firmly pressed, held by a well manicured stark white delicate hand. The pressure of the metal tube tight against my temple, which I’m sure, is creating a nice circular indentation upon my skin at this very moment.

I hear the rain outside pouring buckets of cats and dogs. I hear the cars cutting through the river that is the road as I sit immobile just two floors above this moving passive world.

I could die here tonight, brains sprayed all across my desk. The cops would have a hell of a time playing connect the dots in trying to figure out my face after the trigger was pulled. No opening of the casket for the wife and kids, or friends. If I had any of those.

She was itching to kill me. This was a woman who meant business.

I could tell she knew her business, knew her business well. She wasn’t breathing heavy, in fact she wasn’t breathing at all!

Well that’s peculiar.

A small, dithering of low laughter filled the darkened room around me. Who was with her? My one eyeball twirled to see.

“Don’t worry about them, they are the last thing you will need to worry about. Indeed the last.” Her voice crackled like burnt paper to my ear. I knew she was smiling eventhough I couldn’t see her.

“What do you want?” I asked, calmer than I felt. Perhaps I was already resigned to my fate.

“Your fate is in my hands is it? That has always been your mistake almost from the moment you drew air into this world. You are like so many I meet in this world.”

She pressed the gun harder against my skull. The metal bit deeper. I could feel the blood starting to flow down over my cheek near my eye.

“For fuck sakes! Stop! What do you mean!?”

“Think, you fucking moron. Why am I here. Right now. In this room. With you. Holding a gun to your head? Think hard before you speak another word.”

Think, think, think. I know if I said the right wrong thing she would pull the trigger.

“You got that right, stop telling yourself to think and actually do it.” Crinkle, crinkle went her papery voice.

She can hear what I’m thinking?

“Yes, for fuck sakes you are just now picking up on that, god I hate my job. Think.” I saw her grip tighten on the trigger.

So I thought. Quietly to myself. I thought. Then I knew.

“I know why you are here. I asked you to come. You are Death aren’t you? Actual Death.” I cringed in my own pool of drool just asking her, it? or what the fuck ever the correct pronoun was appropriate.

Suddenly the gun was removed from my head.

“Congratulations, now sit up, not much time left. Listen carefully. First, you are abysmal at killing yourself. I have presided over your almost corpse six times prior, waiting and waiting and you always seem to pull through. Now this seventh time you knock yet again on Death’s door. Do you know how rude it is to knock on someone’s door and then run away…..well do you!!” She yelled like a Banshee then, causing my overturned bottle of rum to shatter into a thousand pieces.

“Well?” she asked almost too quietly. I heard her tapping a foot on my hard wood floors.

“Oh, um, I’m sorry. I thought that was a rhetorical question….of course it’s rude. I didn’t know I was ah uh knocking in my defense. I never thought death was literal in the sense that you are… I uh mean standing in front of me like your are in the real sense of things….” my words dithered slowly to a mumble as she slowly leaned forward into the dim light over my desk.

I was struck by how beautiful Death was immediately as her/it face came into view.

“Why thank you, and I should be and I’m not an IT, she is the proper pronoun, and I need you to hire you for job” she said, replying immediately to my thoughts.

” A job, me,  investigating for you, Death? What could I ever possibly help you with?

“My death, my very own death.  You see, someone in precisely seven  days, sixteen hours, three minutes and  two seconds is going to kill me.  I need you to find the killer before he, or she, or them, or it kills me.”

by Philip Wardlow  Jan 16th, 2023

Caves,Tsunamis and Sand Castles


The lot of this world are mere cavemen, still fresh and immature in thought and nature from the hole they crawled out of…

Squirrelly in action, violent trying to get that nut, not knowing why the compulsion drives them, while many others sit on the beach sunning themselves as the tsunami(s) roll ashore, smiling as their children make sand castles in the grand shadows of the approaching waves.

Glass Heart


I am an  imperfect man.
and she has a beautiful perfect
transparent heart
of which she lets me
hold in my rough hands.

Her heart is warm to the touch
never cold, for inside of it
it's full of fire, a fervor for life
I see burning bright, for her heart
is made of the most pristine glass
I see through it clearly
to the flickering flames within
that dance and dance
always before my eyes.

Yet I am flawed, and my
seeing leaves me sometimes blind
at the warmth and wonder of
her heart I hold in my hands.

I wish her heart to never break
nor the one to be the cause of
the breaking.

I hold it delicately lest to crush it,
yet not too firmly for it to slip
from my hands
I hold it with a willful assurance of self
as I marvel at the magical
glow that pervades from
within.

Her glass heart is stronger than it
seems, more than she even knows.
Tougher than any Titans mighty
blows could wrought asunder.

Her glass heart's unwavering
transparence
mesmerizes my eyes, for it is true,
so very true straight to
it's core.
and beckons for me to hold it
for all the rest of my days.


by Philip Wardlow , August 31st, 2022













The Adored and the Smitten


Which do you prefer to be?
The Adored or the Smitten?

Why, as the Adored must come
all the rewards, 
Eyes upon you,  an audience
numbering from one to one million.
Hell even the right one can pour it on thicker
in one mere moment than a million.
How can you lose. How can you not see
all the pleasure that brings?

As the Adored are you ever bored?
The Smitten have always outnumbered
the Adored. 
They keep coming and coming and coming.
Literally they may be coming.
But in all seriousness,
let's just hope they don't knock upon
your door as they can get quite obsessive I have heard.
Gift upon gift, upon gift,  just to catch a peek
perhaps to see, if what they  they sent
fits.
It does, Oh , it's divine! 
Oh, by the way I also like the white
one.

But the Smitten, oh the Smitten, 
they have their dreams
manifested in flesh, and a smile,
and words that are just for them.
Oh, the attention....it's everything.
To be seen, to know you affect their
life in that one small moment 
To possess the power to push it 
up or down.
They are allowed to  live within the life of the Adored, sitting at
the edge of them, just a hair's width away
from their every movement.
Keep those compliments coming though,
never wary for the Adored do get bored
as do the Smitten.

It's a transaction,  a give and take. 
A take and give.
Did you think you were Special?
You the Adored, do you think you are truly treasured? 
You the Smitten are you truly charmed? 
Do you think you see them as they truly are?

If in this life we flow from Give and Take
what is ever truly real, what is ever truly fake
if all our dealings are ever based upon
the transaction?

by Philip Wardlow,  August 31st 2022
 


  


 
  




 

If I Didn’t have her


If  I didn't have her in my life
I would be  less than
My days would be dim,
and my  smile would be less inclined.

I would know loneliness, 
I would know isolation
and I would cry the fool every night
of my life if I didn't have this woman
to hold on to when
all the world swung from wrong to
right and back again.

She's a sweet one, my woman,
she's a handful to, but she's 
grabbed a handful of my heart
will all the strength she has in
her, and I don't feel her ever wanting
to let go anytime soon.

If  I didn't have her in my life,
I would ask the Universe why
But I don't have to ask that question.
Because she's right here,
right now, in my arms.

By Philip Wardlow Aug 22nd 2022











Monsters


Name a monster some say and it's yours for life.

Many may never know it's true name or nature yet they usually tend to make one up and ascribe to it all the foul attributes of hell.

Why, they will be so proud of the monster they have invented as to shout its direness from the highest rooftops as they give it a blanket so it doesn't catch cold under their bed.

All the while the real monsters slink and slyly wink as you share a drink with them over dinner along with friendly banter of the utmost esteem.







Stupid Extinction Question on Quora


Humanity is on the verge of Extinction, and the only hope is to go to an alternate Earth where species/races of fiction, fantasy, horror have been brought to life and now roam free. Would you be willing to take the first big step for mankind?

Why go from shit planet to another. If I am going to do all that I would rather go be a Hermit on the Moon or Mars away from most of the people that probably caused the extinction anyways.

Btw we ARE on the verge of Extinction right now but most of us are too buried in our phones to care to see it. Or if we do see it we don’t care, or we feel we don’t have the power to change the world enough to make a difference so why try at all.

Most people ridicule people who act like Chicken Little, yelling and saying the sky is falling even when the overflooded rivers are constantly licking at their back doors, or worse yet , filling their homes up to the brim, or when Hurricanes or Tornadoes increasingly level whole neighborhoods, or their house is lost to a mudslide, or a wildfire , or reclaimed by the rising ocean. or parts of the West simply turn into vast swathes of deserts, or when every fish is fished out of the sea, or contaminated to the point you don’t want to eat it. (lots of “or” there)

Extinction is right in front of us….it’s not a giant meteor that kills us in 1 minute, 1 week, or 1 month….it’s the slow CURRENT march of apathy and willful ignorance that gets us to that and there will be no life saving planet scenario to depend on to get us out of it because we will not have prepared ourselves as a species to take it. Have a good day… 🙂

By Philip Wardlow July 27, 2022