Tag Archives: happy

Adrift


Where waves once gently lapped
now they churn
and pound
relentless.

Once anchored,
now moorings torn
dragged out to sea
all now adrift.

Rising phasing fickled moon
taunts like a schoolyard bully
cold and biting
as it sinks away with the
promised sun,
and its burdensome
loathing gonging heat.

Just an insignificant bobber
afloat,
Eyes staring at the nothing and inward
universe, wondering at the why
of it all, and the wanderings
we seek when the world calls.

Fish nibble at toes,
Tasting,
Sharks circle,
Waiting
For the final death throws,
for most like an easy
meal under an early
morning light.

Delirium
brings a dark, dark,
silhouette
against a lit azure sky.
Pulling…tugging
…breathing life…commanding a body and mind
long past dead to
to snap back to resolution.

Blackness enfolds,
Awake,
softness holding
in a quiet room abiding
of the whitest white
With distant shore finally reached.
As a gentle lapping at the shore
comes to finally an open ear
ready to finally hear.

A new way of life.

by Philip Wardlow 2018

So Happy I’m Sad via the Kloipy Project


HappySad

A fellow blogger who runs the blog, “Kloipy Speaks” whom  I follow and who incidentally follows me  recently asked fellow bloggers and  passerby to his sight to name two things which make them happy while at the same time makes them sad. He called it The Kloipy Projects: So Happy I’m Sad.  Go check him out and see what he’s about if you would like. (but not before you finish this damn blogpost…me first)

He got me to thinking  –

Hmmm,  I wondered….what the hell possibly makes me sad and happy.  Is it eating a bowl of ice cream and then suddenly that bowl of ice cream is empty? No, that does not make me happy and sad. Just happy and wanting more. So happy and pathetic was not the question.

So I thunk and thunk and thunk  (picture Pooh bear tapping  paw to head)

Eureka…!

Via the ice-cream  skewed analogy above.   I discovered that most things which make a person sad and happy are things that were good in the past but came to an end or morphed into something other than the original happenstance or experience. So really for me, it results in nostalgia for something. So here are my two happy/sad moments which I always continue to have…I will also preface that the  happy outweighs the sad by a factor of ten for me.

Experience #1:

When I first walk into a comic book shop and get a whiff of the old musty smell which inhabits the nooks and cranies surrounding every corner. It fills my senses and induces a slight euphoria in my being and makes me at one with the world for a moment.  Yeah, heavy stuff I know. But that’s what I feel. It feels so good to be in a comic book store…the synapses in my brain fire and bring about all my childhood memories growing up, delving and diving into a fantastic world of make believe and mayhem. It takes me back…then I’m sad just a little because I’m not that same person…I’ve grown up. I have a family, responsibilities, obligations…I can’t be carefree anymore…I have to engage in this thing called life.

ComicbookA

Experience #2:

My wife over the years – and I have known her many years – has made mixed tapes and mix CDs for me as I did for her. Its one of those romantic gestures you make when your in love. Its a tribute to your  relationship and your acknowledgment of how much they mean to you.  Every once in a while, I will pop one in and listen to it…

I am of course happy because the world seemed a simpler place. A fresh world of new possibilities and  burgeoning experiences to be shared with a new love. Fresh raw primal passions (sexual)  to envelope yourself in. Then I am sad a little, because some endearments can get lost or morphed from what they once were…not in a bad way just different….and some things you realize can never be the same but you find in that difference a new richness grows.  There in its place is something more special that can only happen with time tested events and the chaos that life brings.

HeartMixedTape2

So there you have it…I hope you enjoyed my little trip into my brain….make sure to  scrape your shoes on the mat before you leave. I don’t think you would want to be walking around with my thoughts on the bottom of your shoes mucking about in your world.

Feel free to share your own thoughts on what makes your sad and happy at the same time. I would love to hear them.  Cheers.