Tag Archives: love

Inquiring Minds

Changes and Letting go

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When younger, my life seemed in constant change and turmoil at times; parents fighting, my mom running. Always never knowing what was to come next around the corner. Where I might live. What school I might be attending. What friends I might have. What was right, what was wrong. My dad dying. My brothers fighting with me. Stealing from me.

Seeing my family change from happy to bitter and mean and depressed. Seeing them all slowly falling into this pit of darkness and destruction in their own personal lives by all their endless trippings of mistakes they were making and I could do nothing but watch them. I loved them all and I had no guidance myself for what it meant to be a man. My dad died when I was about twelve but my mom had separated and took us from him years before, but I held to him though. The memory of what I knew of my Dad. His caring eyes, his patience, his slow almost reluctance rise to anger. His calm knowledge and assurance of all things that he did teach me before he died.

I pulled him forward with me through time from my terrible junior high days of almost homelessness and trying to maintain decent grades at a school that expected your best at all times. I kept my head up and my smile even through my failings knowing my time would come and I would eventually win through.

I made friends… some good for me, some not so good but they all helped me learn who I was and who I wasn’t and who I wanted to aspire to be as a man all the while my father echoed in my mind.

Girls and Women showed me my failings growing up as the stupid teenager and man later in life that I was. I failed them all in certain ways which caused them to fail me. A collective comedy of errors on all our parts with no blame or disparages to throw.

I found we are all human. All failures big or small.

I have changed. I have grown. I have failed and will probably fail again. But I have learned, I am wiser, I stand taller. I do not look down or am ashamed. Because the past is not me. I am me right now.

Ever moving forward to bigger things.

by Philip Wardlow 2018

Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work

All I know

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Are you my soulmate?
Are you kin to my spirit within?

At the inception of the universe,
did my atoms mingle with yours?
Did your energies play with my own?

Did destiny play a part in all our fateful
days as we twisted amongst
the stars through billions, and millions of years, to dwindle down to Earth to finally share a kiss which held a resonance and a mysterious affinity
that can not be explained away.

Or I have met you once before in the purgatory of souls lost wondering in the void, finding quiet comfort and caress in the serendipitous chance in a billion, trillion, quintillion of meanderings of spirits. I found you, YOU, amongst the multitude, then lost you fully in memory and in touch as you slowly faded away, what chance then to find you yet again in a dance, in a smile, in a laugh, in a kiss long sought and well remembered.

What chance indeed.

And I remember you, no matter
the mystery of us.
I remember.

By Philip Wardlow 2018

 

Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work

3am Wonderings

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Three hours after midnight
Three hours before dawn
I wake
Why?
Who knows but my internal clock
It tells me its time to think on things
that only bring
a sigh, a laugh, or a tear
on why my life
turned this way or not.
Lamp light filtering through
to a curtained life best seen
in the starkness
of the day
lest the fanciful or melancholy
meandering mind of me think
on the oddness of my ways
long or shortsighted as both
sides of me can be.
Never trusting either.
So I wonder of
Them all, I and it.
And you.
You alongside
always affirming
always striving
always dreaming
always seeing
always loving
and I wonder at you
the beauty
the strength
the grace
the audacity
the splendor
the vulnerability
I am home
in you
I feel it in my bones
I am home.

by Philip Wardlow 2018

Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work

The Gravity of Her

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She is a force
an attraction
a passion,
pulling
a satellite revolving around the world of me,
a kiss filled with stars
that have never lost their
spark.
She is a meteor falling
Captured, I won’t let
go of.
She burns bright in my sky
My heaven filled
Gravity clutching,
holding down
the me of me
where I need to be
with her
Beautifully grounded.
as I kiss her in
in a nighttime rain
upon a lonely street
where the clouds fall
droplets compelled
Did they ever have a choice?
Did I?
Not hardly,
when it came
to the gravity of her.

by Philip Wardlow 2018

GiFs for your Entertaiment, Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work, The EROTIC ZONE

Beautiful Drop Dead Dizziness

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I won’t complain at the tiredness
in my eyes and befuddled brain,
because of the late night tryst
you and I partook of
when the clothes
came off.
as you electrify
all my senses
in one intense
sequence of
events starting with
a drawn out kiss
full of delicious
heart felt
endearing sweet
recklessness
and abandon
that even after
being gone from you
a day, or an hour or two I find
I miss.
Wholehearedly and objectively.
Profusely, never obtusely
I see that I am good
for you and you are
good for me
You are just
the right kind
of drop dead
dizzy.

By Philip Wardlow 2018

Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work

Not much Time left for you

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Stop, please cease and desist.
Don’t fatigue me with humor
from an encrypted list

That only you have the key to
and do not wish to share
as you give me yet another vacant stare.

Egotism seems to be your religion,
a character flaw so ingrained into you
that it’s exclusive to everything you do.

Vindictiveness is your fallback,
a solitary friend who knows you well
as you sit there alone in your man-made cell.

Even if you were to apologize
for your misbegotten callous deeds,
your sickly smile causes it to be ill received.

Still you smile that sardonic smile,
thinking you are the king’s clown
to entertain the masses as you fall down.

Tell me a riddle of what I did see
in you that made me think in that moment
I would find a soul deserving my lament.

Oh woe is me to ever possibly call you a friend
Woe is me to not see the signs
so easily to be seen by the blindest of the blind.

Love could save you and make you whole,
change the boy to a man and the fear to admission
that life offers a cure to your self-inflicted condition.

Little do you know that time is not kind.
It seeks no friends, it cares not for your life.
It does not sit and wait for you to make up your mind.

By Philip Wardlow

GiFs for your Entertaiment, Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work

The Moon and the Stars told Me

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I sat on my front porch
and stared out at the dark.
The moon was full
as was the sky
of stars
and fireflys.
I was seven maybe six
I was happy in that
moment,
content,
Looking up,
Lost in the moon
I thought of her
a girl I never knew
she would be pretty
she would love me
deeply as I loved her
And we would
be together
for all our days
I thought of her
somewhere else
looking at the moon
thinking the same
of me
“I will meet her one
day,” I whispered
to the night.
Then I went quietly
back inside.

By Philip Wardlow 2018

Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work, The EROTIC ZONE

I Hunger

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You walk the forest deep
Little Red
For I follow in my silent creeping
Oh, what a poor innocent creature
You be
Did noone tell you
You should not tread
these woods alone?
I have not tasted
one such as you in
A long while
and
My tongue drips
as I lick my
lips in anticipation
in making a meal
of you this morn.
Will you scream, will you run
Will you cry as you fall
fall upon
the ground
With me above
And you beneath
Snap goes
a hidden branch beneath my feet!
You turn,
Eyes wide,
Yet not afraid,
You move in close
Drawing me into
A warm embrace
With a wicked
grin bringing me
to the ground and
your open
Legs.
You are no innocent
Little Red

By Philip Wardlow 2018

Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work

My Elemental

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She is Fire,
warm, smoldering,
hot to the touch,
all consuming
and hungry.
A brilliant bright undulating red,
mesmerizing to
behold as her flames
dance
Ever higher and higher

She is Earth
solid and nurturing
dark and mysterious
hidden and yet known
demanding and wanting
yet giving in full measure.
Rooted in wisdom, she grows in me
Holds me in the gravity of her,
planted deep.

She is Water,
Life sustaining,
A thirst quenched, a drought abated
A light cool sprinkle on a hot day
A swim in with clothes cast off
A river flowing, cutting through me,
meandering, delving into my secret
ways and passages of me
that only she could truly see

She is Air,
Felt as a playful breeze
kissing a cheek
As a moan through the trees
desperately searching for me
She often taps against my windowpane wanting to come in.
So I set aside the lock
pull up the pane of glass
and breathe her in
Then exhale
only to slowly breathe her in
all over again.

She is
my Fire,
my Earth
my Water
my Air.

She is.

GiFs for your Entertaiment, Inquiring Minds, Poetry Work

If you Fall

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The future
is an undulating
bright blue fluid,
opaque in
clarity
carrying us along
in seeming chaotic
currents
Ever pulling
Ever churning
Yet,
a sense of purpose resides in its
flow,
a earning
a conviction
creating a burning
In the dark
depths
Of our lost souls,
but if you
should cascade and
Fall
Tumbling
Over
A
Sheer
Cliff
Wall
Well, then I
guess
I’ll soon
follow after.

 

 

by Philip Wardlow 2018