With you


I met you with a kiss and a dance
and that’s how I will always want it with you
soft red lips on mine
and a melody
to move us fast or slow
Living in the passion
playing in that playground
of music and light touch
little girl
So take my hand so I can always
twirl you to the moon
and watch you fall back to me
with that beautiful mischievous smile
on your face
that holds me like
no other woman
possibly ever could.

 

by Philip Wardlow 2018

Don’t disappear


oasis

In my hallucinations
I take her
And she feels good to take
Every part
from inside curve
To out
She revels in
the immediancy of
my touch
I revel in the longing
of her kiss
Lingering over
my parched lips
needing
the oasis of her
nature
Sustaining,
Life giving
Don’t be a mirage
Don’t disappear
Don’t go away
Babe
You are all I have
in this biting heat
And long meandering
days.
Real or not

By Philip Wardlow 2018

Lost One


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I’m a melancholy mind
floating in forgotten winds
never fully
free of the damaged
parts that float around,
hard to catch,
hard to see unless
you look deep into me
I want you to, yet
I fear you are too distracted
and I cant blame you
for who you are but
I need you to see.
No one has really
ever found it but
I want you to.
I fear you cant.
The beautiful kid
that is still lost
and needs to find the way back
To run, to laugh,
With a new heart in hand
But this sun is
Blinding
And home is only
a made up memory
that already set

By Philip Wardlow 2018

Unprocessed


I learned long ago
to bury my feelings in every
day life
the highs and the lows.
Why be happy when its just going to be
taken away in an instant.
And why show you are sad when you will
just bring every one down and they
really don’t care anyways.
So I smile. I joke.
I say I’m good, how about you,
to turn the conversation
away from me.
I have always been good at that.

But it builds in me
This tension.
Stresses of the day, anger at people, fears in life, continued failures.
I hold it.
I do much better inside when I let it out.
And I do.
Like reading a book, or watching a movie
I fall away from the world and I am just am.
Pushing my body in a work out, hard, really hard.
Having good sex, really good sex.
A good stiff drink.
Retreating.

But I’m working up to a better version of attack.
Talking to someone I trust to find
the feelings I can’t express or bring to
focus to what’s inside me that hides there even from me.
Like why I feel anxiety about seemingly stupid things I
shouldn’t.
Unresolved anger that I say doesn’t bother
me but does.
Why I fear a future I should love to imagine.
Hitting a punching bag helps,
riding my bike, free, unfettered
in the sun, in the wind
Away from the world.
Helps

But engaging really is the key.
I am releasing that need to
keep that wall sustained
I think it has hurt me way more
than it has ever helped

I want my melancholy to melt
I want my mind to connect
and my smile to flourish
in every possible way.

by Philip Wardlow 2018

My View of You


 
Bright reds
Calming blues
Exploded
In my head
Crazy swirling futures
Abounded when you came
Into view
Hope returned
Tender thoughts flowed
simply knowing you existed
in this world
You brought me to my knees
Seeking something
close to you
If it could not be you
Oh,
If it could not be you
Let it be something
Close to you.
Please see
You are my direction
I seek,
My compass
Following
True North
I have become a
free spirit forever
flowing down
a lazy river to your
final embrace
of your
welcoming shores
by Philip Wardlow 2018

She Was and Is


I could call her a flash of lightening
cuz she blinded me back then
oh she blinded me good.
I still need my seeing eye dog
to get
me to and from.

She turned my head
whiplash fast
entering that room
Now when she enters the bedroom, oh
its my doom.
I hope the doctors
are standing by because I’m
gonna need revived
after she uses me up.
Again.

I tell her she doesn’t
realize how beautiful she is.
How her smile catapults
my heart.
How her dark green eyes
slam into me like
an unseen force

Words come hard at times
So, So hard
When did I ever get so lucky
When did I ever deserve such as you.
Don’t pull that rug from under me.
Let me stand here
just holding you
just knowing you
forever
You are my favorite dish
of ice cream, I linger
slowly in tasting

You are my home, my creature comfort
You are my heartbeat.

You Are the one.

 

By Philip Wardlow 2018

 

 

 

 

 

 

I Fear


I fear I will fail myself
and in turn fail you
That you will fade and drift
away from me.
That I will say all the
“right” words
And you will still go
because I wasn’t enough.
That the me I am
cant sustain
the path you
wish to take
I fear your eyes
not seeing me anymore
I fear your hands
not wanting my touch
I fear your silent words
unsaid.
I fear the distance that might
grow between us
never
coming close
ever again
I hold too tightly
in this instance
I fear everything about
it ending.
And then it did.

by Philip Wardlow 2018 (written in 2017)

My Red dreams


Danae by Gustav Klimt

She
sleeps,
My Red.
Slumbering
deep
alongside,
I feel her dreams
seep,
into me,
fitful and fractious or
calm and light.
Through them all
she holds.
Not a thousand times a thousand
treasures or other delights
could draw me away this night.
For she has been long sought
this red curled angel
of fairness
This soft, sweet beckoning
beauty
in endearing repose
A creature not easily known
but by a few men
bold enough to unlock the magic
of her soul.
I count myself a fool
to hold such a fortune
as this in my arms
And will continue
to play the fool
for her all my days
to come.

By Philip Wardlow 2018

Fear and Want


I fear the tangle
and the untangling
I want the nearness
but want to runaway
I fear words spoken
in the light of day
but want those
same words
whispered in my
ear in the dark in
full embrace.
Fear and Want Juxtaposed
Side by Side
a creeping glorious
Twilight

 

By Philip Wardlow 2018

 

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MelDouleur.com

one thousand words are not enough

Erotic Yearnings

Erotic Poetry and Stories

STROKE(d)

journal

TheFeatheredSleep

Tigers not daughters

VIVID LENS VIEW

Let Your Eyes Do The Talking...

Awapara Art

A Place to share My Love for Painting, Life, and my Wandering Mind

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Hiking with snark in the beautiful Pacific Northwest 2011 - 2013

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Reviews, raves, and rants it's all about the books we read

ReclusiveDreams

a clusterfuck of words

World of Horror

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by Kelly Lewis

Megan Kay's Blog

Linguistic twists dripping from my wanton tongue. WARNING: My words are written to be viewed by a mature eye 18+ please

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