Tag Archives: Arts

I like Big Books and I cannot Lie – A poem

I like big books and I can not lie
You other scholars can’t deny
That when a librarian walks in with an itty bitty waist
and slaps a big paged volume down in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your specs
‘Cause you notice that book looks stuffed
Deep  in the pages the words be blaring.
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get with you
in my lap to read the big picture
My schoolboys tried to warn me
But that big book makes me so ornery
When I rub its Rump-o’-smooth-skin
spine and I’m not allowed to read it.
Well, use me, use me
‘Cause you ain’t that average mystery
On the shelves, I’ve seen those other books dancin’
To hell with romances
I ‘m tired of magazines
Conveying to me flat books are the thing,
Take the average smart man and ask him that
The book gotta pack much back
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got your big book? (Hell yeah!)
Tell ’em to shake it! (Shake it!) Shake it! (Shake it!)
Shake that healthy book!
And baby, baby, give me my big  book back!

by Philip Wardlow girlreading2

NaNoWriMo First Fail for Me…..(and perhaps you as well?)




I’ve love this kid….

So I went to him and asked him what’s your secret. How do you do it?  Where do you get your gumption.. your gusto…your huptza.. because I needed it last night…

I didn’t get to the magic 1667 number of words for the day on the  NaNoWriMo contest yesterday.  I tried…but I think my mojo was way off. I did write and did progress, so that is something right Mr. Successful Baby? Successful baby? What’s wrong?

Oh, you have a fistful of sand in your mouth?….Got it.  I’ll just let msyself out….thanks …good talk Successful Baby….don’t worry I won’t let you down again…Promise


Images to JUMP start that brain for NaNoWriMo !!!

Don't be afraid  to embrace a stranger....meaning the words you haven't met just yet.
Don’t be afraid to embrace a stranger….meaning the words you haven’t met just yet.

NaNoWriMo Bitches!   and I cannot yell it loud enough!  (sorry I’m channeling Jessie from Breaking Bad there)

I thought I would root through the web for you guys and  JUMP START YOUR BRAIN;  to  INSPIRE, to PUSH, ENCOURAGE,   to SLAP you awake,  or to  SHAME you to write and KEEP WRITING!


Whatever it takes to get you to keep writing I’ll do it …so don’t be a slacker….I mean it. That means you.  Who me?  Yeah I’m talking to you.  Get off that porn site or those fuzzy little kitties playing on  YouTube.   Or those Fuzzy little kitties watching porn…WHAT?…never mind…just turn it off and get to work!


We are already nearing the second week of the contest very soon,  that foot should still be on the gas pedal ….I don’t care if you’re  ahead of  the word count or not….no coasting BITCHES!

I pull out my Uzi and lay them low...one by one RAT TA TA TAT the words just flow...BOOM!
I pull out my Uzi and lay them low…one by one RAT TA TA TAT the words just flow…BOOM!

Like building something with Legos when you were a kid, you didn’t know what is was going to be, but that didn’t stop you.

Killer Girlfriend- 30 Day Halloween Poem Challenge Poem #21


I knew the moment I spied you

that the devil lived behind those blues.

How long ago did you trap him, for

I see he’s itching to play.

It’s clear from our encounter,

your a girl who  can handle her boomstick

when it goes off with a kick.

Your grip on the gun is tight but loose as

silver bullets fill it, along with a gleam.

You smile that smile that I could die for as the

full moon rises, and

the day descends to glorious night.

My hand takes yours as we roam

the dank castle far beneath in the catacombs.

I’ll take the hammer,  you take the stake

as we take out a vampire or two on our first date.

When other monster’s wish to interlude upon

our first kiss your casual air and

sadistic flair with an axe

cannot be denied as the crimson droplets fly

in the midnight air….Oh, I think I’m in love!

Let’s not dawdle, let’s not hesitate in our fate.

For we have a rendezvous, me and you, and it involves

Frankenstein and the Wolfman’s  heads

on a plate.

by Philip Wardlow


The Dark – 30 Day Halloween Poem Challenge #16

The Dark –IntheDark

I’m in the dark.

I look at it, as it looks at me.

Silently it sits.

The minutes  draw out to what seems hours.

I move left, it moves to follow.

So I stop. It stops.

The sound of heavy breathing, like the bellows of a fire

emit from its mouth. My heart speeds up.

It seems to be waiting for something. But what?

I raise my hand as if to wave. It waves backs.

Oh you fool,  it’s just your reflection in the mirror.

Calm your breath, its your own lungs you hear

expelling in your ears, your own movements which

track from across the room distilled from the dim

photons which bounce back to your misguided


“You idiot” I tell myself out aloud.

“Yes, you are” it answers back.

by Philip Wardlow


Evil Eyeball – 30 day Halloween Poem Challenge – Poem A Day Poem#10


I see you evil eyeball in the dark,

You twitch , roll, spin and watch

Please stop your spinning to and fro

Or else, Squish! you go between bare toes.

By Philip Wardlow

Outside your Window – 30 Days of Halloween Poem Challenge Poem#9


Outside your Window –

Have you ever had evil imaginings,

awake or dreaming,
and confused the two?

A  palpable scene,

with the texture of  black  silk covering

from head to toe,

wrapping around your neck as your breathing slowed?

The dark outside solidified against the glass

as something settled it’s gaze.

A pinprick of pressure to the skin at

the nape of the neck.

It’s waiting to be let in.

Your hand rises to the latch, as you wonder

at  the horror that seeks you and the  curiosity in

which you seek your own demise.

Perhaps this will be the night

you finally die.

by Philip Wardlow

Devil May Care – 30 Day Halloween Challenge – A poem a day – Poem#6


Devil May Care

They call me Mr. Mysterious,

Darkness who wears a black hat and a devious grin.

Clever, crude, quick to charm but  never

a prude.

Your sins have invited me in.

So there is no need for fear, for you

see, I truly care that you see me

as I see you.

Shadows dance for my pleasure

For they are the ones you cast

and fling out with pure abandon.

I am a hunter in my heart.

Pure and simple, you are my prey.

Collecting you as simply as a little butterfly in

a mason jar.

And how I love to see you flit and

fly about, reckless with no direction

until SNAP!

You sit upon my myriad of shelves

far far below.

Simple part of my collection until

time runs out of time.

on your miserable little soul.

by Philip Wardlow

The Last Supper Art Challenge to my Fellow BLOGGERS!


Found this cool piece of art work out in the nether regions of cyberspace through others  I follow who also posted it.  The artwork is Copywritten by Bill McConkey  (now I have to go check out more of his stuff)

This for me, is my form of religion if you will …sacrilege I know…. 🙂

Can you spot ALL the  movie references depicted in the artwork. That includes the posters hanging on the wall as well.

I would love to see if anyone finds something that  I might have  missed.

Good luck…  btw  I counted 25 Movie references and  identified all 25….so HA!

You Cheeky Raven, Nevermore! A Poem


Oh Raven,  you may tap,tap,tap,

incessant in your endeavors to ever trap

me in your tangled lies ten feet deep.

I be not such a fool to fall sway to your unearthly rules

of tortuous maladies you delight in inflicting on ever passerby

you do seek to see that lies in your line of darkest sight.

Your taunts as you perch and preen on pedestal high

do naught a thing to one such as I.

Your guile lies transparent as a ghost.

A thrown token. shiny and bright to fall at my feet.

Yet, as I do bend down to pick it up,

you no sooner pilfer my pockets of my weeks hard earned

fortune as you seek to simply

call it black luck where I would be none the wise.

Nevermore you say!

Bah, I say . Be gone this night before the morn

brings the dawn and turns your cheeky words

to flotsam to be carried away on the shore’s

of my discontent.

You may know the depth of many souls

as you may know mine,

but there is no barter to be had, no wager to be paid.

MY soul is my own.

No matter how dark and cold.

By Philip Wardlow