Tag Archives: philipwardlow

I am

IMG_20170821_000146_767.jpgI Am…

I am a rogue, a scoundrel, flirtatious and a smart ass like Han and Lando.
Have been since I was eight
its my nature
sorry…not sorry
I give grins
Sexual Innuendo
But with a sincere affection
Behind it all
I will give you an ear
a hug
and not always what
you want to hear
But I’m real
No bullshit
But just don’t catch
me drunk
then I can’t be trusted
I see beauty every where
And try to hold it tight
But it often flies away.
But it comes back in
One form or another.
I am mischievous
A dork
Love sex and do it well…:)
Also love the value of sexiness
Because life is meant to be
brash and fun
As serious shit abounds
I apologize way too much
to myself
for actions I have
Yet to perform
I am a work in progress
at times too slowly.
But I’m learning.
My way works for
For I am me and that’s
what I will continue to

Any Takers? Need assistance on my Upcoming Collection of Stories



I plan on Self-Publishing 10 to 13 stories in a Collection in Electronic Format such as on the Kindle and other forms of electronic media and also produce a limited number of my book in Paperback form with real paper and everything …  🙂

That’s where some of you may come in.  I am NEED of one of  two things from some of you talented people out there in the world.


First thing I am need of, are proofreaders and/or  readers/reviewers  of my stories to tighten up my grammar and my typos, and to possibly catch any blatant writing pitfalls I might fall into from time to time, and to tell give me real feedback on each story in regards to critiquing them constructively. I  will need a few people to help in this  to expedite the process so I can get my collection ready for publication in regards to good story content by mid year which is fast approaching.


Second thing I am need of, are artists to provide me with small black and white sketches pertaining to each and every story.  I will then sprinkle those pieces of art throughout the pages of the book to  visually capture and entrance the eye and add a little bit of spice to the book 🙂


For both requests at needing your help,  I am sorry to say I cannot compensate any who might help me in my endeavor. I will most assuredly will give credit where credit is due with each picture used in the book. I will also as part of the forward cite all the help I have received on the stories in regards to the editorial process put forth by anyone who has helped guide me to get this book out to try and making it the best it can be.

So please feel to contact me directly at my  email address at  philipwardlow@gmail.com if you wish to help me with this endeavor and I would be forever in your debt…:)

I want this Book to be  something I can be proud of from the ground up and with your help I know I can make it happen. I have read many of your guys blogs and know you have much talent.

I am working diligently on finishing up a few of my stories and will be looking for help with the editing and review process as each are finished.

In regards to the Artwork needed, I will be writing a brief synopsis  of each story or a description soon to this blog of what may be actually wanted for an image.  I do want to give the artist free reign  at thinking of something appropriate to capture the eye and also the spirit of the story.  ( if the artist wishes upon request I can send them the entire story to read to really get a feel for what the piece of art might be)

So again, please feel free to contact me at philipwardlow@gmail.com if you are interested in helping me with my writing project… 🙂

Thanks again!


A New Direction in my blog? Or just back to where I belong…




I started this blog back in 2012 to promote my writing. I wanted to hone my craft as a writer of stories, to entertain, to inspire, to convey a bit of my own philosophies and life  lessons ,and to also  have an outlet for all the pent up pressures of the day and prove to myself I could be a successful and  write with the best of them eventually.

This blog was not supposed to be just a distraction to my day, or a hobby, or just something to past the time or  to socialize with. This blog was created with the intention to put in real time, real blood and sweat and tears and simply write, to write stories, work on my creativity, to inspire, to show you me and let the chips fall where they may.

Gradually over the years I got away from that….I think the fear crept in, as the publisher’s rejections climbed intermingled with the very few triumphs received. So I gave up a little each day. I don’t think I knew I was giving up. But I felt the passion for the long runs going away….the putting in of the time necessary to get to the good stuff.

So I limped along on here…throwing out poems mainly….some good, some really good….some just meh.

But that was a finger in the damn of the need I felt flowing in me to produce what I KNEW needed to come up out of me.

SOOOOOOOOO…to make a long story short…I made a realization suddenly this week.

JUST STOP!  RESET…Go back to what you want and SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

So I am. So look for more stories on here  and more focused work from me.

My first project will be  a collection of short stories  new and old to be published this year.  YES THIS YEAR. YES THIS YEAR.  I must say that as a mantra to myself to make sure I do not falter.

I plan to publish these stories  in electronic and paperback book format. So hopefully you are in for  entertaining excerpts from my mix of  stories in the coming month or so.

I will still write the occasional poem but hopefully with even more thought and careful consideration and appropriate flair as can only come from  me.. 🙂

Tomorrow I shall list some of my stories in my planned book collection with a brief synopsis or possibly scene excerpt to show you what I am all about and what is crawling around in my head….  🙂

Wish me good luck!





Roadkill – Novella Ebook – 2day FREE Promotion Starts Today Saturday April 5th!!


ROADKILL Amazon Free Offer 

If you are new to my website you may not have realized that I Epublished a book to Amazon that sells for $2.99,  called you guessed it, “Roadkill” , back in late 2012.

If you look to the right of this article,  you will see a direct link to that story on Amazon’s website. You can also click here or above.

Starting TODAY on Saturday , April 5th  through Sunday April 6th,  it will be available for FREE for anyone to download for the Kindle. (The time for when it starts may not be Exactly  after Midnight the first day but it will start that day)

You don’t need a Kindle to download it and read it but you will  probably need to download Amazon’s small Kindle app program for viewing on your PC before being able to download and read the story. Other than that it’s a piece of cake.

Please read my little synopsis below or go to Amazon’s website to see what the story is about:

Roadkill Synopsis:

There are things that lurk in our world unseen, dark creatures lost in a time and a world so ancient as to be forgotten by the same humans who made dark dealings with them so very long ago.

Now per happenstance, on a dark shrouded road these worlds will collide briefly again….

What would you do if you hit and killed something on the road in a raging blizzard in the middle of the night and that something you killed had a companion which meant to force you to make amends for your actions?

Adrian is the thirty-something already troubled family man who suddenly finds himself in that world. Adrian soon discovers it doesn’t want him. It wants the thing he holds most dear to his heart. Whom will the thing choose as the price to be paid, Adrian’s lovely wife Elisa, or his young eight year old daughter Sylvia?

Following the ancient laws set forth, a balance must be kept, and Adrian the good family man, must pay the price whether he likes it or not. Will Adrian have it in him to fight to keep his family whole or will he give into his fears and past traumas that have haunted him for years and lose the ones he loves along with perhaps his own life in the process?

How is a writer created? More specifically How did I come to want to be a Writer.

I love a good origin story when it comes to the hero. BUT I am NOT going to bore you with the biography of my “exciting life”.  I will however key you into the  start of how someone like me turned to wanting to write in the first place.(so perhaps I may still bore you but I will try to keep it exciting by throwing lots pictures at you so your brain doesn’t get too tired with my ramblings.)

I will start out my “story” with a question.   WHAT shapes a person in life?  That brings up the next question to me, Nature or Nurture?

To me the logical answer is both…duh? –


See those guys there above in the picture?  They are my  brothers of which I have two of.  I am the one on the left (with the cool lean going on ).  They  definitely shaped my life.  Mainly because I was the middle kid of that trio growing up.  I looked to my older brother (middle kid in pic) to guide me in what I thought was the way you should act as a boy, guy, a man, because  our father died when I was twelve and he was all I had for a role model.

In the end, he only taught me how not to act, to which in itself  now that I look back,was helpful.  My younger brother only ever gave me a sense that I failed him somewhat because I think he looked to me, somewhat like I did to my older brother; for some direction. This time growing up with them was pivotal in my mind because it made me realize  that if you want to  find the answers to a problem when people are depending on you, you have to do it yourself, because no one else was going to do it for you.


The next picture above was going to be a picture of my mom. But I thought better of it, because  she’s not the focus really in my little story,  just a character to the side really. Instead, I wanted to show my escape that I went to in the early years before and after my dad had died. My family life  was in shambles from probably the age of four.  I remember the fights, the plate smashing, the bitching by my mom, in how life was never good enough or how we lived in a hell-hole. (I loved my hell-hole of a house by the way..I knew no different) .   I only remember my Mom in all this because my Dad was always the quiet one.  He just would sit there on the couch or at the dining room table  and listen to her rants until she calmed down which always seemed to end in crying.

So I escaped ….I would watch shows like Creature Feature, Twilight Zone, Buck Rogers, Speed Racer, or Scooby Doo, ….I fell into the stories and the more the fantastic the better. The more removed from reality, the more engrossed I became and nothing could take me out of it. I was in that world while it lasted.  These were worlds  that I could understand more than the ones right inside my own home.


As I grew older, I’d say about ten years old, I came  to love comic books. I discovered them in a little book shop across the street from our new apartment house (first of many to follow) in one of my mom’s flight to get away from my father .   For 25 cents and up, you could purchase a world where anything was possible and live vicariously through the eyes of a character and see what they saw and know what they thought. Needless to say, by the pictures above,  my favorite character in comics was Spiderman. But the thing is,  like I am sure like many other fans did, I identfied most with Peter Parker, his alter-ego. He was smart,determined, didn’t fit in because of his awkwardness,  had an Uncle Ben (father figure) who had died and they were poor.  Spiderman cracked jokes all the time.  So yeah, I  identified with him more less. And yes,  I am corny, I did believe in the phrase “With great power comes great responsibility” line.  I still do to this day and it shaped many of my decisions more than than once in my life. Not saying I’m a superhero jumping off buildings trying to save people.  I’m saying you could have the power of hurting someone’s feelings with the wrong word or you could instead instill in that same person a sense of something to boost their pride or keep their spirit going…everyone has value ….yeah I have always been a sensitive kid that way (to a fault at times).


The next logical progression after comic books for me was books…oh those magical books…I love the person who founded the library system and screw that YA author & actor Terry Dreary, who recently stated that libraries are not relevant anymore. I was a poor kid way back when and besides shoplifting I couldn’t have read a quarter of the books that I read in my younger years without that glorious thing called a library card. Those books saved me. Where my brothers found escape in running the streets, shoplifting, fighting, smoking, or drinking,  I found it in words. They wrapped around me like a cocoon where I grew and grew inside.  They helped form inside me  a vocabulary, a world, and a mystery only I was privy to.

I hit my teen years where life divided me into two worlds….those of my friends who to me ,had everything I didn’t,  to a family at home which was slowly disintergrating before my eyes; my brothers, my mother, and me to a degree. Where once I was kid who found possibilities, now I saw only wanting an escape. Home was not a comfort, it was a prison, a sentence to ride out until school or I visited my friends at their home.  I developed a complex about everything from the gap in my teeth, to the way I would sometimes stutter when really nervous, to the clothes I wore, and the place I lived. I never had friends for a sleepover because I was embarassed about my family and home. I always felt inadequate to the task; never quite good enough for the rich kids or smart enough to fit in.

So I studied and I studied. I got smarter. I forced myself to beat back the depression with knowledge and lose myself in asking the abstract questions. To question everything and challenge myself not to be led by others. I still didnt feel like  I fit in, but I had begun to have better tools to see myself as not as a joke in their eyes but more as an equal.


After a few failed girlfriends and a couple of years in college I finally met the love of my life and married her….She turned me around (even though I didnt realize it at the time) and taught me the value of what life is.  She taught me the value of committment and compassion and that things mattered. No more was my story mine now it was ours and I wanted to share my life with her….



Then he came along and made my life a living hell.  You know I’m kidding…. But life was a worldwind for a bit…Those years of him growing up, were fast and furious , and for some reason, writing really never entered my mind. But as I went from one  job to the next job,  to the next job in my  career I woke up one day and  realized very  strongly I didnt  want the path I had chosen and that I felt I was made for bigger things than the lot  I had fallen into.

I wanted more than the hum drum day to day life I was leading….so I went back to college and took Creative Writing & English Lit courses.  I got in with other writers and talked with them and learned from them. I started writing. I started CREATING.  Then that little butterfly that had waited so long to be formed and released from its Chrysalis broke out and flew. Now I’m blogging about my journey to be the next Stephen King or the next Ray Bradbury or the next Philip Wardlow….I may have come a little late to the train station but I caught the last seat in the car….and I’m settling in for a long trip.


Tag I’m it…Wish to see into my mind? Well, here’s your chance with a little Q & A

tag-youre-it1Na na …na na na…I’m it!

A fellow blogger of mine, whom I follow and who follows me , over at Lily Wight The Arcade of Arts, tagged me and few others to answer some questions.  I guess am it.  These questions below were presented to me to answer as I see fit…perhaps you will get to know me a little better afterwards:

Q.  Have you ever been obsoleted from your job and how did you feel about it?

I will say no. I have struggled and crawled my way into my position at my job and they can’t live with out me. Now, they come to the almighty Philip and wait on my every word. (Sure they do)

SONY DSCQ.  What is your favorite board game and why?

I loved the Electronic Based Board Game Dark Tower and I miss it till this day because mine broke awhile back and they no longer sell it anymore. It was the coolest board game hands down…it was way ahead of its time and still is for a board game…Monopoly has nothing on it. Pah! I spit on your grave Monopoly.

Q.  When you look at the stars, what do you see?

I see a beautiful mystery &  potential adventure . So much potential if we only play our cards right as a planet.

Q. When you look at the ocean, what does it remind you of?

Lost stories of civilizations come and gone along with a hidden world as vast as space.

Q.  How do you overcome writer’s block?

Well, first I call it less a writer’s block and more a writer’s quicksand.  Sometimes, I stop what  I’m trying to write and stretch my brain on something else, like poetry, or I’ll blog, or a really good movie. Basically, I shift gears to something else for a bit then shift over to what got me stuck in the muck in the first place. Usually, that helps me drive through it till I hit the next bog in the road again.

Q.  If you could say 3 encouraging things to another person, what would they be?

That it’s never too late.  That doing something starts with actually trying to do it,   and that if you make a mistake don’t beat yourself up over it, learn from it and move on.

Q.  Do you prefer to write your stories/books/poetry/prose/articles on paper first, then type them upWriting and edit them, or do you like to type them straight into your computer to edit?

I used to be all over the board, but I find I do like to write my poetry on paper first  and refine it later on the computer. I will tend to scribble a few memo like notes of story ideas in a notebook and  then take that to the computer  to start the full blown story.

Q.  Do you like writing in one genre or more?

I like to mainly write urban  fantasy with a slightly dark aspect to it. I like to take a miserable character and bring the best out of them in that setting. I can apply that same theme through horror, or science fiction stories which I like to write as well sometimes.

Q.  As a writer, do you think actions speak louder than words?

I think its a combination of both juxtaposed in a nice balancing act that brings out the best in your story and characters.

Q.  What is your favorite quote and why?

Heard this  from a friend who quoted Henry David Thoreau –  “the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation”  –  I found that line comforting in regards to my struggles with my writing and in my life.


Take your Luck – A poem by Philip Wardlow

Shut the hell up cuz you got luck
so take it and run with it.

The suitcase I carry isn’t full
of the…
or Maneki-neko lucky cats.
It’s got more of the broken bits
of mirrors that I have collected
over the years or the dead black
cats that have called it home…

Sure your pain is yours,
own it…I don’t care,
but don’t ever think it compares
to my level of despair.
Don’t whine and don’t bitch while
your lucky number seven sits on your
back and lifts you up while my
thirteen has been nothing but mean
to me, bringing me down to depths
that hell can’t even see.

I have my magpie of sorrow
who talks to me often…he thinks
it a joke to lead to me believing
that the world works at times.

But I do care for the lucky ones, so
don’t let him catch your eye.

Take your luck and run with it,

and maybe just maybe you won’t
end up with the same luck as me.

By Philip Wardlow  2012

bad luck1

Cruel Master – A Poem


Cruel Master

I have no opinions of which you would care to hear;

for the heart is a cruel master which binds you tight.

Cry out and you will only get more of the same I’m sure;

another beating to send you back into the corner whimpering.

So I slink around the edges of your eyes and live

in the shadows of the moods you cast.

And hope that you never see I am slowly

poisoning the master you have come to


So one day you will be free.

by Philip Wardlow 2013

THREE Poems from my younger years – by Philip Wardlow























By Philip Wardlow 1989

(PS.  And yes I sadly had just broken up with long term girlfriend at the time n my teenage years)



A Brother Far Away

Stomp Clomp Stomp Clomp

Marched the Family of elephants

As they trod the dusty distance

To the watering hole.

A brother far away

Hears the tink chink tink chink of steel  against steel

to announce the arrival of the Big Top to town

A tenderly nudge of a mother’s

Trunk gently directs her curious baby back on


Brother feels the pokes and prods of the steel

Tipped hook as it lashes out at him when he makes a


The chuckling of the hyenas and the

roaring of the lions nearby incite

The lead elephant to bellow a warning

to keep away.

Brother hears the hoots and hollers of the crowd

Behind the dark circus tent as the lion’s cage  lumbers by

with the great beast still asleep inside.

A west wind blows pushing through the plains , flowing over

The feather dusted clouds encasing the moon which hangs like a

Fluorescent white pearl over the watering hole.

Brother dips his trunk into the bucket and

Comes up with the last drink to be offered that night as he

Strains at the shackles to get a glimpse at the moon.

By Philip Wardlow 1995


Nothing & Something?


That’s what I feel like sometimes


Nothing, nowhere, no how.

When I see sunsets casting purple hues and

pinkish wisps set in a bowl of vibrant golden orange,

It always reminds me that I’m nothing

And something

A nighttime sky, filled to bursting with a voluminous moon

And a menagerie of stars and planets spinning and coalescing in a

Constant rhythm we can’t begin to see. That’s when I feel like


And something

A single stolen kiss in the dark with a girl who didn’t know I existed until

today,  soft yet firm, gentle yet wanting. Nothing exists, not even


And yet something…

Clues and misdirection, blind alleys and thorough fares, leads me by a

Leash to nowhere

Yet somewhere will be the end when the journey’s through

I am humbled at times but at others

I am petulant.

I am tired of feeling like nothing

Something sounds good

By Philip Wardlow 1996