Crow Crow don’t ya know, know. know?
What you looking at Mr. Black?
Inquisitive one, smart one…
oh you know, know, know.
by Philip Wardlow 2014
Tag Archives: funny
I’m trying to Flap my Jack as fast as I can…
Rest in Peace Harold Ramis….Or Shake up the Afterlife like you did this one.
List of Movies Harold Ramis, wrote or helped write, acted in, or directed (or all three at once) –
Animal House
Stripes
Heavy Metal (voice acting)
Meatballs
Ghostbusters I, II
National Lampoons Vacation
Caddyshack
Groundhog Day
Airhead
Bayboom
Love Affair
High Fidelity
Orange County
The Last Kiss
Back to School
Analyze This
Analyze That
As Good as it Gets
The Ice Harvest
Club Paradise
Multiplicity
Stuart Saves His Family
Bedazzled
Knocked Up
Walk Hard: The Dewy Cox Story
Year One
Calvin and Hobbes The Darker Version
Haikus – The many moods of me – by Philip Wardlow
amongst them I fly freely
No ground to hold me.
from worlds I have brushed against
clear and newly cleaned.
My middle finger gives cue
to whisper screw you
as my world revolves around
my eyes on your hips
because your beauty demands
it of my lost soul.
from a smile, kiss, to caress
A peek at my heart.
Peace in a vacuum of words
Abandons the day
A terrible tidal wave
of pure savagery
Intertwined, a mosaic
of feelings unbound.
dismal days stretch forever
as the coffee cools.
dipped in the frigid waters
of a warm welcome.
Skeleton Prince – 30 Day Halloween Poem Challenge – Poem a Day – Poem#8
The Skeleton Prince,
with eyes dark and vacant
as an empty mouse hole,
looked down from his lofty
perch.
Feet dangling over a crescent Moon.
Halloween had come again.
All the little children
were scurrying about from house to house,
collecting their useless tidbits
of candy.
During the year as always,
ignored he was, no matter how
how loud he yelled down through
the clouds.
The children didn’t like him.
He supposed it had to do with his lack of skin.
It was just skin.
Who needed skin on the moon?
But Halloween had come, and for one night a year
the children looked up and saw past his
lack of skin and smiled.
And he smiled back and even waved
at some who stopped and took the time to
really look up.
He knew it was fleeting,
for soon Halloween would be gone.
and the loneliness would return.
But he reveled in their smiles and their laughter.
The witches, the goblins, and skeletons and the myriad
of monstrosities which abounded.
He was one of them, if for the briefest of moments,
and the coldness in his bones seem to lessen
just a bit.
The night flew like the fall winds
and nary a child walked about.
Most were inside counting their candy
from the mountain dumped upon their
living room floor.
Soon there were none save one
in the night.
A little girl, wearing a dress of
gossamer white, with a diamond studded
tiara upon her dainty head. Crying.
“Why do you cry so.” the Skeleton Prince asked
“Two mean trolls took my bag of treats” said the little girl
looking up.
“That is no way to treat a Princess,” he huffed
“Here, I think you will quite like this instead.” he said, as he pulled from behind
his back a jagged saw which he placed against the moon and began to cut a piece off.
Bits of the moon crumbled and tumbled to the little girl
below and fell into her lap.
“Take those pieces and place them under your pillow.
Make three wishes before going to bed, and in turn you will wake to them
fulfilled in good stead. Now GO!” the Skeleton Prince commanded
The little girl ran.
With that, the Skeleton Prince went also to bed,
head hanging low to wait for next Hallow’s Eve.
A knocking awoke him, and that knocking
was inside his own head.
for the little princess was their tap tap tapping
on his bony skull.
“I made Three Wishes dear Skeleton Prince.”
“One was for candy, and oh, did it come in loads!”
“The second was to be your friend. So here I am!”
“And the third…?” The Prince asked
“Why, for it to be Halloween every single day of the year.”
by Philip Wardlow
Oh Wednesday – so True
Haunted Baby. – 30days till Halloween Challenge – Poem #2
Haunted Baby
While I slumber you climb out from your graveyard crib
and creep.
What foul revenge do you seek?
Baby Baby , Haunted Baby.
Stay Away!
But to my kitchen you do go,
to grab the sharpest knife you see,
then toddle and teeter on unsure feet
with a sure grip on blade in hand,
you make your way to where I sleep.
Baby Baby, Haunted Baby
Stay Away!
I toss and turn,
for in the dim fog that is my brain,
I feel a nightmare approach
in a slow dead march
down my long dark hall.
Baby Baby, Haunted Baby
Stay Away!
With dead baby teeth you pull your way up
my crisp linen sheets like
an animal enraged.
The moon shining through my window
is the sole witness
to your evil
as you plunge
the blade deep.
It is only then a smile
replaces the snarl
on your lips
as you fade off to
sleep.
Baby, Baby.
By Philip Wardlow
I am Fighting Zombies this week – A gif
Life can feel like this sometimes, a never-ending horde of zombies.
But you gotta punch, kick, …fight fight fight…
and say “fuck you little dead eyed bastards….”
’til eventually you are the last one standing.
by Philip Wardlow
Deadly Campfire – A poem for all you Campers out there this summer
We abide by the warmth of the fire,
our backs to the cold night woods that surround,
as dark imaginings linger through already mangled minds.
What could it be that terrorizes us this night?
We hear it, for it roams in a circle about us,
raking its claws on the trees in its passage,
brazen and bold in its rustling of the dead leaves
underfoot as it tromps its course.
Heavy breathing speaks of a great beast.
Long ago did our merriment falter and grow
into a cruel sickness within.
Fear is our only companion at this gathering
turned into a mournful wake by nature’s
hidden foe.
Rose was a pleasant girl, bright and full
of light.
She was the first to go.
Harold never had a chance as it took him.
I have his blood splattered across my clothes.
I shall miss them both.
Max was next, with his silly stupid grin,
as it’s claws raked his face off.
Julie cried and cried, and held tight to
her log, but still she died as it took her
and that piece of rotten wood.
Sylvia and I stare into the embers,
clinging to each other and a reality
that no longer resides.
Once there were six,
now only two.
My beautiful Sylvia, my love, my life.
Yet still I feel no remorse as I throw
her to the creature and began to run… 
**********************
by Philip Wardlow 2013
Ain't no rest for the Wicked - Philip Wardlow - The real and the sensual sides to life in all its facets.. 